Friday, January 18, 2013

No Fear - until somebody mentions the word lawsuit.

When I wrote before I had no fear.
I wrote from the point of view of knowing I was not perfect, being willing to accept when I was wrong, change what needed to be changed without altering my core values of decency and respect for mankind.
I also knew I could back up my statements with saved correspondence, dated photographs, google analytic's, sitemeter readings, phone and text records.
But being threatened with a lawsuit has changed that for me.
I am now, more than ever, acutely aware of the way lost people in their defensiveness can effect the way I provide for my kids by threatening my income.
I get that now and that and that alone is the only reason why I shut up.
NOT out of respect for those who did wrong, the callous family members who never reached out to me in my grief or those who shunned me once I went public, like this is something I shouldn't talk about.
(You all can piss off.)

Here are interesting statistics we can all remain indifferent towards until it directly effects us;
35.1% of households headed by single moms were "food insecure"

Number 8 in the slide show is my life now.
Do you really want to tell me I have nothing to be angry about?

In 2011, I gave Mike the responsibility of the patina business that I conceived in 2009, developed and released in 2010, he was my partner.
He maintained part time hours overseeing the patina preparation and shipping which supplemented my income as he focused on his health and the kids.
He quit. in Sept.
I tried to keep it going on my own, however other areas of the business were neglected and I couldn't handle it. Me and the kids had to move from our home in Fl. Nov.
 I tried stocking the patinas again using free labor provided for me by my mom (♥).
Jan. 2012
However, sales from reopening the online shop were not enough after missing a whole holiday season shut down and I could not afford wholesale purchases anymore.
But then I used the money Erin paid me for her links due at Bead Fest to invest in more patina! Feb.
I moved to a house for me and the kiddos. All sorts of self sufficient, aren't we, Shannon? may
Sales died. Like completely. July
(I didn't know about the new patina products on the market being promoted by full page ads on the backs of  nationally read magazines and released at  Bead and Button, I can hardly compete.)
I did not cover living expenses which then began the whole domino effect of late fees and over drafting payments, literally taking food from our mouths. Aug.
BUT sales pick up! I pay bills, we are fine. I'm silly for thinking I have to quit missficklemedia. Sept.
Sales down. :(  I begin looking for a job (a whole other ranting post for another time).  Oct.
My computer crashes and then is stolen. I am still in shock over this and grieving the loss of so much work and personal history it feels like when Mike left me all over again. Nov.
I am not getting the call backs I would like for the positions I applied for and try to lower my expectations from retail to service positions.
But a full time housekeeper only brings home $288, that's not enough to cover living expenses that require at least $95 a day.
My parents purchase a new computer for me (no, they are not rich, they just work really hard and stick to a tight budget so they can give to other people). Surely the holiday season will bring it back, I've been working like a mad woman to have high quality product ready to go both to stores and online. Dec.

I watch in amazement as my sales roller coaster, $200 one day, nothing for 4. I have no idea what my income actually is or what I can count on. During these months I feel like I am coming to from being unconscious. I am trying to deal with so many emotional and behavioral issues (remember, me plus 2 very important little people who are uncertain about life right now and the whole reason I work from home need me) I can hardly think about my promoting and marketing. I simplify everything in our life, no satellite tv, cell phone, monthly subscriptions. We go old school, 70's styles, I feel like it will be okay if I just keep working hard and stay focused on the kids. We become very resourceful and more grateful for what we do have. We spend more time together over cooking projects, cards and board games rather then in front of the screen.

Jan. 2013
I am now in full acceptance of the fact that I do not make $50,000 a year anymore and I need to move into a more affordable home and find a steady paycheck that covers the remaining expenses.
I can hardly think about losing another home, it makes me physically hurt.
But it isn't one of the problems that just goes away, see? I have to think about it, I have to figure out a solution, I have to think about how to make sure it never happens again and my kids still have the same quality of life that I worked hard to give them before, when I was in a partnership.

Here's what brings me down a bit;
The whole adultery, deception, separation and divorce thing is nasty business that sets goal oriented, tax paying, hard working women back.
And that's a fact, Jack.

Much Peace and Prosperity are needed right now,


Saturday, January 5, 2013

I am totally impressed with Jewelry Affaire's new PR & Social Media Manager; Yili Ma

I knew a project of mine was going into a future issue, I just wasn't sure when. That makes it really hard to help promote the magazine and my work with scheduled blog posts, shows and give-away's.
But Yili Ma sent a professional, timely email informing me of when to expect the magazine and what to do if it does not arrive.
She also included a pretty badge for the blog that links directly to the issue;

(instructions on how to use it!!! Thank you!)
and an offer to link to any shows promoting being a published author in their magazine.

"Hello Borders."
 I stride in flipping my long black cashmere cape over my shoulder and tossing my gloves and hat to the nearest sales representative.
"I'm here for my author signing." 
"You there, behind the counter, may I please have a caramel macchiato waiting at my table for me. And make sure the crowd stays behind the velvet rope. I'm agoraphobic and prone to spells."
I flounce to the back of the store feeling important and needed.
Ready to talk jewelry....

Anyway, I found all this so amazingly organized and easy, there was no way I could over look an important article that features another one of my favorite metal art clay artists;

The article includes instructions on adding a bit of color to the flowers that Jen makes and assembling them to inexpensive brass chain in dramatic but simple ways. I hope you have fun adding the technique to your Spring line up!

To celebrate my article being published in a more humble manner than the imaginary book signing, I am giving away this adorable Grungy Heart necklace. Oh yes! She makes hearts too!

 Please leave a comment in, er, um, comments if you would like to be entered in to win the Grungy Heart Necklace and I will draw a name a few days after I remember that I forgot to draw next Sat.

Thank you to the magazine Jewelry Affaire for letting me share my passion with their readers and to Jennifer Tough for sharing her talent with other jewelry designers.
Peace and Prosperity,

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Dirty Dishes and Champagne Flutes

The bar was dead but for a few lone souls.
He leaned in and angled the earring towards him, his rough fingers grazing her neck;
"It looks dirty."
She smiles coquettishly and says under her breath,
"You betcha."

Happy New Years!
I am so happy 2012 is finished. I like that it is over and gone. It feels good to say that a whole year has passed and I do feel smarter and wiser for it. I swear I learned SOMETHING. Now it is up to me to make sure the new year is completely different! I know change is good, but do I have the back bone to follow through with what needs to be done?
"New Year's Day... 
now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual." 
Mark Twain